The System is an Illusion

In my time at DFCS I have met many people who refer to "the system," to getting lost in it, to how it doesnt work. I think this is because it doesnt exist. The System is no more than a construct of our minds. What is ussually referred to when people talk about the system is simply people working together. In GA this community of people working together is formally called DFCS when it pertains to families and children.

Calling DFCS (and those it works with) "the system" presents several difficulties. Primarily is continues to dehumanize those involved in it. It also assumes that DFCS works together with its colleages in an organized manner, and that everyone is working toward the same goal or with the same rules.

We who work in the system already feel dehumanized enough just by what we do. It is an unfortuate part of the job. there must be some distance between the worker and the client. It just has to be there if one is going to do the job. That does not releive the worker of his/her responsiblity to act as an individual with their own independant ability to make decisions and judgements. As much as the worker has the responsibility to remain detached from the client, the worker also has a responsibility to make natural human decisions and to keep in mind that the client is a real live person as well. To hear DFCS described as part of the system only reinforces the idea that the worker is not human but only a peice of machinery. When one is not human the imperative to behave humanly is lifted.

The question must also be asked of who is a part of the system. Obviously the state agency is the core of the system. The state agency probably has the strictest and most encompassing pollicy. The state agency also feels that greatest burden of liability and has the most accontability in the state office structre. State agency is definitly included but what about the courts, group homes, foster parents, CASA volunteers, charitable organizations, attorneys and research groups. Who is and who is not part of the system.

Just some thoughts, there may be more of this in the DFCS cool down period. Maybe not.

IT IS FINISHED

So thats it then. Friday was my last day at the office.

Im going to miss the people I worked with. There are a lot of great people at my office and in a lot of the group homes that I have worked with. I regret that I spent two years getting used the navigating the system and the people in it and now im leaving and done with all that. I feel that at the end of my time I was good at what I did only because I knew how to fulfill all the requirements and get the right things done on time. I also knew how to differentiate between what needed to be done now and what could wait. This was the most important thing for a case manager to master in the job.

At least with me the people skills were there and just needed the right space to come out. There were things that needed to be done and I did them. I used to say that I wasnt a people person. I wouldnt really say anything right now. I do what must be done, in the work or personal world.

So what am I to do now? I really wouldnt mind a job that is a little less personally destructive. Working for DFCS was so thoroughly draining. At the end of the day I would just want to go home and collapse. I've watched a lot of netflixes over the past two years. There were many times when I couldnt do anything after work because I was just two tired to meet new people and be social.

I imagine that the nature of this blog is going to change. Maybe ill use it to continue to think about DFCS. Wait i dont know that I want to continue to think about DFCS.